Is Passive Aggressive Communication Good For You?

passive aggressive meaning, passive aggressive communication

Everybody has got a friend that just acts out passive-aggressively. You don’t blame them, nor do you want to judge but you do want to understand passive aggressive meaning and learn how to navigate passive aggressive communication. 

Maybe sometimes you do it, too. But what does it actually say about you?

Let’s first talk about the different communication styles in addition to passive aggressive communication and differentiate one from the other. 

passive aggressive meaning, passive aggressive communication
Tense Asian businesswoman looking at male partner with crossed arms. Two colleagues confronting each other in office space. Clashing personalities concept

4 Styles Of Communication

Passive communicators typically avoid expressing their true emotions or feelings as not to engage in confrontational conversations. This is half of the passive aggressive meaning. Passive meaning not direct. 

It’s an excellent method for not hurting someone’s feelings, but there is always a chance you will fall into a pit of frustration. This internal frustration builds, and can potentially become bigger. 

Many people that express themselves passively fall into depressive moods, feel anxious, and can’t get a grip on real emotions. Because of this they fall into passive aggressive communication. Let’s continue to explore passive aggressive meaning more. 

passive aggressive meaning passive aggressive communication

Aggressive communicators are mainly focused on the Ego and step into a conversation thinking not for the other conversationalists’ emotions or thoughts. 

People that communicate like this often leave others to feel afraid, insecure, intimidated, and in general discomfort. Passive aggressive communication is designed to intimidate the other person.

Passive-aggressive communicators are the ones that present themselves as passive but, at a certain moment, reveal anger simultaneously. Passive aggressive meaning is when the person withholds real communication but then lashes out aggressively in an effort to bully or intimidate the other person. 

Most people communicate like this because they feel powerless or don’t stand up intellectually to the level of the conversation. 

Assertive communicators are the healthiest communicators of them all. They clearly state their attitude and feelings while taking in mind other people’s thoughts and feelings. They have a balanced approach to their communication style. Passive aggressive communication does not take another person’s feelings or thoughts into consideration. 

The Passive Aggressive Communication Epidemic

As we’ve concluded that passive aggressive communication isn’t good for us as it is not healthy, then comes the question – why are there so many people that communicate like that? As we explore passive aggressive meaning we can see that speaking this way to another person is not only healthy it can also be harmful to others. 

Think about It – in many cases of having to meet new people or engaging in conversations with people that you already know comes a moment when one of you becomes passive aggressive here are some strategies to deal with passive aggressive communication.

So, let’s start with… 

Read Also: How to Improve Your Posture

Understanding Anger

One of the basic and most typical of human emotions is anger. We are taught that anger is bad in an early stage of our lives. 

It’s either in school or at home we need to suppress the anger in order to be socially approved. This is a source of passive aggressive communication suppressing your anger, and not being able to express yourself fully. 

All this leads to hiding your anger and pushing it in the closet so as not to offend someone or seem not normal. 

This kind of social pressure leads to an unhealthy emotional base for conversations. This is an aspect of passive aggressive meaning.

You’re Sugarcoating It

Anger doesn’t just vanish after you’ve suppressed it. It’s there, and it’s building up. 

The result is you being confused as to how you are supposed to speak with others so you start to express yourself in alternative ways which leads to passive aggressive meaning and passive aggressive communication. 

It’s Simply Easier

It is way easier to be passive-aggressive than assertive. Learning how to communicate is something that you build step-by-step in your younger years. One of the passive aggressive meanings are people that have not learned how to fully communicate with others. 

If It’s not tough at the right age, there are quite a few symptoms that can show later in life. Sulking, Indirect communication, and emotional withdrawal are the results of the lack of social knowledge.

You Feel Like You HAVE TO

At a certain point, you feel like in order to reach a specific stage in your professional growth you can’t be assertive because people see it as a weakness. 

This becomes a model of approach in your life, and you cannot let yourself seem weak by being Mr. goody-two-shoes. If you are over aggressive this can be a response to underlying pain, frustration, or unresolved traumas. This is an aspect of passive aggressive meaning not fully processing and dealing with your trauma and then exploding that onto other people. 

It’s… Rational?

Often in our lives, we like to rationalize things that seem to be a part of us without thinking they actually may be bad. 

In a scenario where we procrastinate, don’t feel like doing something or we’re overall lazy we use passive aggressive communication as a tool to seem like the victim. 

This is a severely common practice in our modern society, and If not stopped at an early age, it becomes a life-altering behavior. 

Nevertheless, Remember… 

Though passive aggressive communication is normal and in fact, quite common, it is a form of anger that people don’t want to show outwardly. 

They may not say anything at all, but they will get their revenge in other ways by doing things like withholding affection or refusing to help with tasks around the house. This is the passive aggressive meaning, punishing the other person for not behaving. 

If you’re feeling passive aggressive and need some emotional balance, try these three quick tips so that you do not feed into passive aggressive communication. 

1) take care of yourself (nourish your body and mind)

2) make time for self-care (take a bubble bath or read)

3) practice mindfulness meditation techniques such as deep breathing exercises when you feel the rage boiling up inside.

Stay ZEN! Make sure that you process through your emotional upsets, and are more balanced before you communicate with others. 


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